Friday, March 9, 2012

More on the Gender Agenda

Boy in a dress, or girl with a penis?
Only time will tell.
I have often talked about how we are raising Rowan as free as possible from a gender agenda. This means that we are not limiting his expression or interests based on his (perceived) gender. He wears "boy clothes" and "girl clothes" pretty equally. He has long hair and it is often in a ponytail or in ribboned barrettes. He has a kitchen set, a play vaccuum, and a purple dog named Violet as well as cars, footballs, and dinosaurs. He likes pink and things that sparkle, so he gets them.

Boy or girl? We don't know yet.

And as he gets older and understands more of the culture going on around him, we will be having all kinds of discussions that will help him to decipher and deconstruct sexist messages and help him become a feminist man. Because we plan on unschooling/homeschooling, we hope that he will avoid much of the bullying that accompanies fluid gender expression.

A wonderful film- have you seen it?
He (we will use male pronouns unless he corrects us, and we have gender identity discussions with him already to open up the conversation) is free to express his gender and sexuality in any way he chooses. We select books like this one and this one and songs to sing to him carefully- trying to ensure that they open doors to possibility, rather than restrict his expression and make him feel bad about himself or others for choices.

I just got an email that there is a new study happening for parents of gender non-conforming kids. If this applies to your child, please check it out. We are not participating, because Rowan hasn't expressed any preference, he likes everything. So we do not wish to skew the research.

If you are interested in reading more about kids who are gender non-conforming, check out Sarah Hoffman's recommended reading list. Here is a great page with links to resources for parents of gender non-conforming kids. For Jews, here is an awesome resource as well.


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