Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes....

Does a caravan turn back from a journey because 

of the barking and clamour of dogs? 

On a luminous night, does the outcry of dogs 

delay the full moon in its course? 

The moon sheds light and 

the dog barks. 

Everyone proceeds according to their Nature. -Rumi

Bike friendly Portland will allow us to be car-free.
The transit is also so much better than Columbus.

So my family has been doing lots of thinking lately. And we have made some major decisions. We moved to Ohio because it was good for our small family to be near extended family and a support network. We moved here because it was cheaper than our beloved Bay Area and we needed to regroup and get back on our feet financially. But it is NOT home. We have met amazing people here, and Columbus is pretty neat. It just doesn't fit all our needs.

So, here's our plan:
My partner is currently getting out of student loan default. Ohio, with its cheap cost of living is allowing us to do that. He will be able to return to school very soon and will be getting degrees all the way to PhD (to be a therapist, among other things). He will make a great therapist.

I love being near water. Not only does Portland have
the river, it also is an hour from my beloved ocean.

I am in grad school and soon will be switching tracks radically. I have been in seminary part time since 2009 and have decided it is time to move on. I gotten some great things out of SKSM, but it is not the path for me. After serving a UU congregation and finding out first hand what it is like, I have decided this is not what I want to do with the rest of my life.

I have been a healer in between other gigs for quite some time. I went to herb school (and continue a lifetime of that herbal education on my own), and am a Reiki master. I have found the call to heal to be steady and patient in the background- all while I tried on many other hats. I have decided to switch schools and prospective careers. In the fall, I will be attending a master's program in acupuncture and TCM. I will get certified and licensed and start to practice while my partner continues on with his school.

Gorgeous.

We have also decided that after my partner gets his BA and I get my acupuncture MA, we are moving... again. We have decided to move to Portland, Oregon. We have amazing friends there, it is more affordable than the Bay Area, and still has many of the things we love about Oakland, CA. It is beautiful, progressive, and clean. It is close to the radical faerie sanctuary that is near and dear to our hearts. It's a day's journey to see the Bay if we so desire. It is near some fantastic Witches we know. It is also charming in its own right- I have been several times and we have many friends there that tell us- "Come here! It is home!"

It is in Portland that we will settle, raise bees, and homestead further. It is in Portland that I will heal my community through Reiki, herbalism, and acupuncture. We just have to bide our time here a while longer.

Portland is weird enough for us. We need more weird.

So thank you, Ohio. You are good to us, allowing us to regroup and revel in family, good friends and interests, and a decent standard of living while we are here. We got to meet amazing people, and I picked up a student of the Craft while here who needed me. Don't think we are not appreciative of you, Ohio! We know what a struggle life could be- we had that constant struggle in California. While we are still considered "poor" on paper, Ohio is relatively easy and we are grateful for a few years of ease, particularly while Rowan is in these critical developmental years. We get to spend lots of quality time with him now, and that is such a gift.

Beltaine Recap

Beltaine sparkle outfit

So as you may know, The Kunnings headed up to Wolf Creek, Oregon to a Radical Faerie sanctuary for Beltaine- as we have done for the last three or so years. The Beltaine celebration there is traditional, from a Witchcraft perspective, and the land is beautiful, sacred, and where our son Rowan was conceived. So we look forward to going each year.

This year, we were up for a little over three days- We arrived Friday morning and left Monday afternoon. It was a whirlwind weekend, as Friday there was a wedding, Saturday was Walpurgisnacht, and Sunday was Beltaine- each event with its own special preparation and celebration.

Wedding cakes!

While I was not part of the official prep for the wedding, I was honored to attend. The love the two involved share is obvious and they are a couple that is tied to this land and community, which made this wedding an amazing blessing to witness and be a part of. The feast afterwards was amazing- see the little cupcakes we had in the barn afterwards? Yum.

Walpurgisnacht requires removing last year's maypole, transporting it to the fire pit, preparing it and the firepit for a loooong bonfire (the pole from the previous year must be ashes before the new one is used), and then starting the bonfire shortly after supper. To do it properly and with the right kind of reverence takes time.

This year's maypole.

Beltaine means going out and finding the right tree, felling it, stripping it and preparing the ribbons. Then when the festivities start, it is carried in a loud, joyous procession to Maypole Meadow and placed in a newly dug hole. Then a new May Queen is found, the old one passes the torch, and we begin the festivities in earnest.

Monday was a time for sad good byes and trying to find everyone before we left- there are some folks we only see at the sabbat! How did you celebrate Beltaine?

Walpurgisnacht & Beltaine

Image by State Library of Queensland, Australia via Flickr

Also not attendees of WC's Beltaine, for privacy reasons.

The Kunnings are making their annual pilgrimage up to Wolf Creek Sanctuary for Beltaine and Walpurgisnacht with the Radical Faeries! We have gone the last several years, and the place has special meaning for us- Rowan was conceived there at Beltaine- so the land and this holiday in particular are near and dear to our hearts.

We will be taking a mini-van with 3 other adults up to the sanctuary and will be there from Friday morning through Monday afternoon. Bonus- a couple long-time Faeries are getting married on Friday! Huzzah!That means we get a wedding, Walpurgisnacht, and Beltaine- all in one jam-packed weekend!

Image by Ben Amstutz via Flickr

Not a pic of folks at WC- that is private.

On Walpurgis night, it is the tradition of this gathering to have an all-night party and burn the maypole from last year's festival in the central firepit. We cannot start a new maypole dance on Beltaine until the old one is cold ash.

Beltaine festivities start in the afternoon in a meadow especially reserved for this event each year, aptly named "Maypole Meadow". A tree is selected before this weekend and felled. All reverence and thanks are given to this tree. During the weekend, volunteers strip it of its branches and bark, except for the very top, which will be visible above the fray of ribbons.

Special sacraments are passed, intentions are set, and then we are off to the races! I remember the first year we went, a friend we brought fretted that it was goingt o take "forever" to dance the maypole, as it was so tall and there were hundreds of ribbons (for all the attendees). She need not have worried. Chaos magick reigns in this place, and it took no time at all for the spider-web mess of a maypole to get done. No prim and proper "in and out" here- it was "do what thou wilt"!

After the Maypole, there are myriad festivities happening all over the land. You are free to take part in any mischief you can find. That evening in the barn (the biggest common building, where the communal kitchen is) is a dance like you have never seen. Joyous, ecstatic, writhing bodies of all kinds together. THIS is a proper Beltaine.

How do you celebrate this time of year?

Post Camp Wrap Up (Part Two, The Witchlet)!

Dirty fussy baby

So, many of you are probably wondering how well (or poorly) Rowan did being away from the comforts of home at camp. His mommy and daddy were very occupied this weekend, trying to balance his needs (being parents) with the needs of the camp and its attendees (being clergy). Did he suffer? Is he the worse for wear?

Attaching the high chair
in the barn

Hardly. We didn't bring a lot of "gear" to the camp to keep him contained and/or occupied- we sufficed with a Bumbo chair (highly portable), an attachable high chair (that attached to a table in the barn, the main common building), and an Ergo carrier for schlepping him around the land. He did have a couple toys that he loves as well, mostly for naptime. But for the most part, he was carried from place to place, being attended by mom, dad, or someone else who volunteered. The beauty of Rad Fae culture is that it is decidedly tribal, and there was no question that Rowan was getting great loving attention from many uncles and aunties- frankly, he was getting more "hands-on" time than what he gets at home! I felt comfortable with all campers there, and they obviously loved hamming it up for a juvenile audience.

Mary, trying desperately not to look
at the squealing baby.

Rowan was constantly touched, hugged, kissed and carried and he ate it up. I was so grateful that people not only tolerated my son, but made space for him and embraced him being there. Papa and I worked hard to balance the schedule and who had primary Rowan duty while the other had priestly duties (Leading a trance = no baby!), but there were times when it was nice to get a break and the fellow campers offered that to us. For that, I am very thankful. He charmed the pants off of everyone there, too. (Did I forget to mention that I have the world's cutest baby?)

Chasing Mary off.

An adorable thing that we knew about Rowan before was that he likes dogs. What we didn't know until the camp was just how freaking much he LOVES dogs! Mary, the land dog, was a constant source of fascination and amusement for Rowan- and it freaked Mary out. Rowan would squeal like a velociraptor on caffeine and giggle like a madman and Mary was like, "Aaagh! Keep away, crazy thing!" (The dog fixation continued after we were on our way home, too- we saw several dogs when we stopped at a pub to eat on the patio. He was so manic and happy. He got to hug a puppy and have it lick his face, and that made him laugh and smile. Sounds like the kid has a dog of his own in the future- a very patient and tolerant dog!)

Bribing Mary to come near.

What were the downsides? First and foremost, the sleeping arrangements. Rowan is used to getting two-three naps during the day and being in bed by 8:30 at night. Because he needs to be within earshot as he is now newly mobile (and therefore a danger to himself and property), we had to try and get him to nap near us, in an area with lots of activity. It was hard and he was cranky sometimes. He fought naps to stay awake and see what all the fun was. The Ergo carrier was a lifesaver in this regard- we were able to stuff him in it when he started to look tired and by the time we got to our destination, he was asleep. Mama and Daddy felt like pack mules, but it worked for the most part. In the evening, when we were gearing up for ritual, it was harder. It would have been great if we had some sort of transportable nest for him to burrow into, but we made due.

Rowan was carried everywhere.

And while it didn't bother me so much, if you are taking your kid(s) to an outdoor gathering, you need to be OK with them getting dirty filthy. Rowan was caked with dust, ate dirt, leaves, and probably more than his share of bugs. And you know what? I'm OK with that. Eating dirt builds the immune system, being outdoors is healthy, and being surrounded by people that love him is as it should be! Eating nasties is a small price to pay for him being immersed in nature, tribe and magick, just the way it should be. But I could see how some other parents might go, "Ick".

Would I do it again? In a heartbeat. And we attend a totally different type of gathering (A pagan convention in a hotel) in February, so stay tuned for pagan parenting, convention style!

Post Camp Wrap Up! (Part One)

Camp altar, left side

So my partner and I just returned from The F(a)eri(e) Magic(k) Gathering that we helped organize. It was a camp bringing together those interested in the intersection and cross-pollination of Feri Tradition and Radical Faerie culture and magick. He thought of the idea originally, and I jumped on board right away, as I also identify as Feri and Radical Faerie simultaneously and thought that the idea was juicy.

Camp altar, middle

We quickly assembled a team of like-minded people once we got the idea approved by the folks at Wolf Creek, where we wanted the camp to be held. Wolf Creek is a sanctuary for Radical Faeries in Wolf Creek, Oregon. They hold almost 80 acres of land and magick has been the land's primary use for decades. It is a sacred place.  We hit the ground running to make this camp happen, as by the time we got it approved, we had a mere month and a half to organize everything and promote the camp to get people interested in attending.

Camp altar, right

It was hellish, especially that last week before camp when several people had last minute problems (Mercury Retrograde, anyone?). We were in a car accident (minor, no one hurt, but the car went into the shop, causing the need for a rental); two others attending had repairs to their car costing serious cash; and the other two Feri initiates  (in addition to my partner) got so ill that they could not come. (This was stressful because as a mystery initiatory tradition, Feri must be transmitted and passed from a priest to seekers- leaving my partner alone in that part of the work.)

Ambar, our second in the kitchen!

But we persevered, got there, and in the end, it was wonderful. But it didn't start out that way. Our first day started late as people were just arriving and settling in. We did manage the meals, Feri teaching, and a ritual (starting with a ritual planning meeting after dinner). It was at that planning meeting that we all realized what we were up against: everyone on either side (and many of those spanning both sides) of the aisle had specific ideas of what ritual should be (and by extension the "meaning" of magick) and were firmly entrenched and invested in those ideas (and somewhat closed off to others).

Elfin, Kitchen Queen

It was probably premature to expect that we could design a ritual together before we got to know one another. Next year, I think the first night should be a social gathering, with dancing and revelry! So our first night's ritual was Rad Fae by default, leaving very little recognizable Feri in the mix. It left much to be desired on everyone's parts, and as an organizer I was left wondering what we had gotten ourselves into. Was it even possible to do this work? Many were mightily discouraged after day one. How to come together?

Jared and Rachel

Many strong personalities had issues that were brought to the surface with this camp. I suggested to one person that, while s/he did not want to embrace Feri as their personal thea/ology, coming to Feri class was worthwhile. It allowed us a common magic(k)al language and made sure that we all knew what one another were talking about. I suggested that s/he "play tourist" and not to take the student-teacher dynamic as an insult (which s/he was), but as a mutually agreed upon, consensual power dynamic. I told her how I also struggled: with the seemingly lackadaisical attitude of some of the other Rad Fae. How it felt like in Faespace, nothing ever happens on purpose, that they lacked discipline (in its original meaning it shares a root with "disciple"- it is a religious term) to manifest their will- rather they appear let their "woo" control them. We both had issues.

Lance

There were some interesting discussions about this topic throughout the weekend, and some of the language used on the exclusively Rad Fae side squicked me, to say the least.

First, there was the characterization of Feri as a "technology driven" practice. This term to me smacks of artificiality, machines, and soul-lessness and I was greatly bothered by it. I think what was meant that there is a thea/ology and specific tools of alchemy for the practitioner. Rad Fae does not have a unified theology, nor lots of tools (but some, which we included). To me, Feri is a religion, whereas Faerie is a culture. That statement does not make one trump the other, it just acknowledges their difference to me. But some Rad Fae think of it as a religious tradition, and felt like because there were no tools to present, that it was at a "disadvantage" in the schedule.

Melisseus

The next term that bothered me (HARD!) was the characterization of Rad Fae as an "indigenous" tradition (as opposed to Feri), which made no sense to me and smacked of cultural appropriation. (Perhaps they meant "pertaining to the self" when they used that term?) Whereas Feri has actual elements of indigenous traditions, Rad Fae is a culture that has no thea/ology to speak of, and just because one has a land to tie you to a place does not make you “indigenous” (especially since most Rad Fae are overwhelmingly white.)

Peacock and Tomkat

Days two and three had a regular, proposed schedule that included one Feri class, one Rad Fae tool (the Heart Circle) and choice of Paths that were both Feri and Faerie and simultaneously neither one. On paper, it looked balanced. Yet one Rad Fae person suggested that they felt it was too heavy on Feri, while still others thought that not enough time was available for diving in deeply to the Feri tools presented, and ended up taking that time for themselves, and not attending other things in the schedule. I am a firm believer in feelings and perceptions over paper, so both were true. In retrospect, we overscheduled the camp, not giving enough time for free time, sex, and land exploration. This needs to be built into next year's camp.

Stella Maris

We had some amazing discussions- both in Feri class (which was a facilitated open discussion about specific tools of Feri: blue fire breathing and manipulation, Iron and Pearl pentacles, grounding, the Kala rite, and soul alignment) and in Heart Circle, opening us up to one another and allowing trust to build.

Sunday was a near perfect day. Our Feri class was actually an open-ended discussion of what Gods people work with and how they do that work. It worked well, as even most Feri work with some Gods outside the Feri pantheon. We did body adornment and mask making in path work, and some amazing masks were made. The ritual that night FINALLY balanced Feri and Rad Fae in a way that we all hoped was possible but no one was sure if it would actually happen. Nimue made an appearance and possessed several people- including a Rad Fae who had never met Her before! The Peacock Angel also was there. We hooted and hollered and cackled and drummed and danced.

And how did Rowan do in this all adult gathering? Stay tuned for part two!

Ideas for Lughnasadh?

I was just talking to my partner about what we should do with Rowan for the upcoming sabbat. When our son, Rowan, was born we made a commitment to observe all the sabbats with him from the very start. We want him to have fondly remembered rituals and holidays from childhood.

But observing sabbats with a child under one is difficult. What to do? We've had decent rituals (albeit simple ones) with him thus far, but his particular age and ability level is getting harder and harder to accomodate.

His first sabbat was Imbolc, and he was tiny. We introduced him to Nimue, one of the gods of the Feri pantheon- (without getting too in depth and giving you a Feri 101, Nimue a child god who has power of a god in the hands of a six year old. She's impulsive, prone to fits of pique, and is fiercely protective of her children.) When we did Imbolc with Rowan, we were parents for a mere few weeks. We were tired and the baby was small and less active than he is now. It was a simple introduction, in front of her altar in our temple.

Oestara was lovely- we had Feri guests and together we held a ritual specifically for baby Rowan- he was blessed by each person there and then introduced to our 7 directional Feri guardians. He got hungry during the ritual and mom and baby had to sit at one point and get our boob on in circle, but the ritual was lovely nonetheless.

Beltaine we went up to Wolf Creek Radical Faerie Sanctuary in Oregon and did their Walpurgisnacht bonfire, Maypole dance, and introduced Rowan to the Sacred Land where he was conceived (the previous Beltaine).

Midsummer was a simple feast and introducing him to bits of fruit.

And now we are coming up on Lughnasadh, when Rowan will be 6 months old- a wiggly, squiggly 6 month old who won't hold still or keep quiet, nor will he be able to participate like a toddler could in dancing or as a preschooler could in crafts. So what do we with a child do at this age?

A wonderful go-to guide for slightly older children is Circle Round, written by three priestesses in the Reclaiming trad. I have a copy of this book and cannot recommend it enough. When Rowan gets older it will be a great resource for us! In the meantime, I intend on documenting what does and doesn't work with a child his age as we go along.

If anyone has age-appropriate activities you'd like to share, I'd be much obliged. Feel free to leave comments here on the blog- and we'll get a discussion started!

Witch Mom Herself!

Me (pregnant at Samhain), at Wolf Creek Sanctuary.