Getting ready for Yule.

My son is going on four and he is already asking why we don't celebrate Christmas "like everybody else". I have had myriad answers for him:

"We are not Christians. Christians celebrate Christmas. We celebrate Yule."

"We are Witches, and we aren't like everybody else."

"We celebrate our holiday many of the same ways the Christians celebrate theirs. Everything you love about Christmas are also Yule celebrations! We will trim a tree, have a feast, invite people over, bake sweets, exchange gifts, hang lights."

It doesn't help that his grandparents (and when he's there, TV commercials) are pushing Christmas- HARD. He came home from a weekend with them talking about it incessantly. I am sure he saw lots of Christmas hype on their TV. And then he said, "I wanna celebrate Christmas."

So I said, "You are going to celebrate Christmas when we are with your grandparents. And we as a family also celebrate Yule."

Then he replied. I wanna celebrate Christmas for the right reason." (Uh oh.)

"What do you mean?", I asked.

"I don't want to tell you." (Hmmm. That isn't good and smells of deceptive indoctrination...)

"Sweetie, you can tell me anything. You know that. Please tell me why it is important to you.", I pressed.

"JESUS." (OK, confirmation of my fears.)

"Well, Christians believe that Jesus was the son of a god. And they celebrate Christmas as his birthday party (never mind it actually isn't his birthday, according biblical scholars). But WE do not believe that Jesus was anything more than a cool guy who said some important things in his day. When you are older, you will be free to seek out any or no religion at all, once you can actually understand them and what they offer. But while you are little, we do things as a family, a team. We are the Kunnings Three, remember?"

That brings a smile to his face. He loves being one of the Kunnings Three.

So now, I am getting him ready to celebrate Yule. With the media onslaught that happens this time of year, I cannot blame him for wanting to be a part of it. And I refuse to take part in the onslaught that celebrates it too early. So after Thanksgiving, we erect a tree and such.

He gets such propaganda from commercials and all his favorite shows (all kids shows feature Santa this time of year) that we need to show him that our traditions are fun and good, too. Cuz frankly, who throws a religious party better than Witches? (No one, that's who.)

He spent another weekend with the grandparents after Thanksgiving. He is coming home this evening. Then he will help us put up a tree, drink hot cocoa, and we'll start teaching him seasonal songs.

On the 1st, we will start the advent calendar (in the shape of a tree, that counts to 21). Inside each drawer is a treat or a slip of paper saying what fun thing we get to do that day. We will teach him songs, let him help cook and bake, light the yule log, and on our actual celebration, we will let him stay up and revel with us (we stay up all night to see the sunrise). I am sure he will fall asleep long before dawn, but being a part of something big and festive is important.

Only after we do our family traditions will he get Christmas, with his grandparents.

How do you celebrate the seasons, especially with little ones? How do you deal with the crass commercialism, the overwhelming Christianity, and extended family that are probably not the same religion as you (and perhaps trying to sway your kid to their point of view)?

My Yule, Appalachian Christmas, Mennonite Christmas/Chanukah with Rowan

Opening Yule gifts.

Life is weird and delightful. Let me just get that out of the way from the get-go. I know that as a Witch (who is a hard polytheist and has a very particular theology counter to what many people know and experience), my life is always going to be a little surreal. That's OK. I chose this life and am happy to live it.

Raising Rowan with our (his father is also a Witch) values while simultaneously respecting the religions of his relatives and friends is always challenging and takes a lot longer than keeping to ourselves or giving up/in to Santa Claus and the typical American secular Christmas.

New Trike!

So this time of year, we celebrate Yule as a family on the 21st, then Christmas with extended family, and then Chanukah with close friends. We counted down to Yule using an advent calendar with special fun and/or candy each day. The morning of the solstice, we opened gifts that were placed beneath a holiday tree that we decorated ourselves (as an event on the calendar!).

I am all about celebrating the traditions that were/are ours as pagans, polytheists, and Witches. I also let Rowan know that Christians do these things too- because they wanted in on the Witchy fun.* So we do the tree, gifts, lights, feasts, all the fun things that most people like about Christmas, but aren't specifically Christian in origin.

A "fallen" snow angel.

Rowan's grandparents are a little puzzled when we tell them that "we celebrated on the 21st", even though they know we are Witches. They ask few questions because they are afraid of the answers. That's OK. At each sabbat, it's all about connection- retying ourselves to the Wheel and each other. So I will not diminish the connection by forcing my views on anyone. And I expect the same from Christians and Jews.

Snow demon

After Yule (in addition to the advent calendar, the tree, and gifts, we had a log that burns three candles, had held a sabbat with other trad Witches in the area at our home), we trekked to Appalachia to Rowan's paternal grandparent's home for Christmas. We had a party that evening with aunties and uncles and cousins (where the family participates in a white elephant gift exchange and receives gifts from the family matriarch), then opened gifts for one another. Rowan made out like a bandit, as did the elder Kunnings- we got a flatscreen TV. (More on this in subsequent blog posts, I am sure.)

Rowan and E.

After several days relaxing with grandparents, we journeyed northward to Bluffton, a charming Mennonite settlement town in Northwest Ohio.

There we celebrated a family Christmas (late) with a family not our own. We traveled there to see our friend, R, and her daughter, E. We know them (and R's partner, D, from our childbirth class with the midwife we shared.

Our children were born a week apart and they have been friends their whole lives, literally. We are close to R and D and cannot wait until they leave San Francisco for Pennsylvania. After that, we will be spending one weekend a month with one another, rotating PA for OH, after they move. Huzzah! For now, we keep in touch with Skype and infrequent visits.

Rowan and E.

Can I just say? I love the way that R's family is with one another. It is a huge family, and very close. They are intellectuals and value education and the arts. It is a pleasure to play "Family Fun Game" with them or watch them open their gift exchange. They are also very active in social justice movements and pacifists, which is a welcome change after Appalachia- where Fox News, polarization, and guns are the norm. R's father is Jewish and her mother is Mennonite. She always resonated with the Jewish side of herself and when she was pregnant, she converted to Judaism and now she and her daughter are Jewish and they do shabbat every week and this time of year, they celebrate Chanukah. So we celebrate with them, too.

My holidays are far from the norm, but I love them. I love that Rowan is growing up with a big universe and knows all kinds of people.

---

*When he gets older, I will let him know that many Christians do not understand that what they do is pagan in origin- and that is OK. We do not need to rub it in their faces, as long as Christians do not begrudge us our fun, we will not piss on their parade, either. (And most of the Christians that we know and love do understand that most cultural trappings of Christmas are actually Euro-pagan and do not care.)

Teaching the Craft

Recently, I have had an opportunity to think about what a teacher of the Craft would need to pass on if they were to teach an apprentice. I thought that the list was interesting, so I thought that I would share it with you.

(These are my opinions of course and other traditions of Witchcraft (remember, I belong to a non-Wiccan, ecstatic, left hand path) may have different ideas- and that is OK. This path is not for everyone and that is OK too. There is room for everyone in all the myriad paths that exist.)

The Tools of Alchemy
My tradition has several specific tools that help transform a person into a Witch, ready to carry the current of my tradition. These tools include a daily sitting practice, working with life force, certain types of energy manipulation to transform the self, and what we call "demon work". These make a person ready to become a Witch. Not everyone can "run the amps" required to be what my tradition considers a Witch. I also differ with the idea that these tools benefit anyone and should be widely disseminated to people who aren't even being considered for initiation. This means that I disagree with some of the most visible Witches in the tradition that we split from*. I think these tools of alchemy are specifically to craft a Witch, not create a "better person". Some of these tools have become very commercialized lately- because they are easy to pass on in their simplest most shallow forms, one-at-a-time, via workshops, books, and intensives and sell them for a profit. That is unscrupulous to my mind. The Craft is not for sale.

The Gods and The Wheel of the Year Cycle
My tradition has specific Gods that it works with, both terrestrial and cosmic, and in order to be a part of this tradition you need to know them intimately and work with them deeply. Many are alien to neo-Wicca or non-initiatory groups of Witches, as they those folks tend to focus on gods in cultural clothing (the Greek or Roman pantheon, for example) or terrestrial gods only (Gaia, The Green Man, the Lord and Lady, for example).

My tradition is polytheistic and does not believe all gods are "the" god and all goddesses are "the" goddess (and we also believe that dualism is a human fiction). But we also simultaneously believe that we are all a part of one thing (did I ever mention that my trad enjoys a good paradox?)- God Herself- and hence all is divine and the divine is immanent. Hence WE (humans) are gods, too- and not just "a spark" or "a reflection" either.

We also teach a Wheel of the Year mythos that is tied to the seasons and the hero's journey- it tells the story not only of the earth's cycles (as most neo-Wicca trads adhere to) but also the life story of the initiate. To understand the Wheel and tie yourself to it is an act of Will**.

Ecstasy and Trance
My trad is not a fertility-based trad, but rather an ecstatic, shamanic one. This is a left hand path which means it can be scary for some and demonized by others. So be it.

Emphasis is placed on achieving brain states other than everyday mundane states (that we are in when driving, shopping, and going about our everyday lives). We do this because the job of the Witch (and yes, Witches have jobs to do!) is to go and be in-between. Between this world and the realm of gods, the fey, and the dead. We work with divine possession in this trad, sex magick, entheogens, divination, oracular work, and out of body travel as ways to achieve and as the tools used while in these ecstatic states. And because these are part of our work, we must be skilled at achieving these states and practice practice practice.

Working in a Group
While many Witches work solo, you also need to know how to work with a group, be it with a few others for a specific working, to celebrate the sabbats or esbats, or in a coven on an ongoing basis.

To that end, learning liturgy and its theological meanings are important. I have found that some teachers (in all kinds of religious traditions) learn liturgy and ritual forms but do not fully understand their theological significance. When ritual becomes empty of meaning, it is then that religion starts to die- because its practitioners do not understand, they merely do things because "this is how we do it" or "this is how I was taught" as the reason for doing things. I know there are several teachers that pass on information that they themselves did not write, experience first hand, or fully understand the significance of. And their tradition suffers for it.

Learning energetic hygiene is also key to working successfully in a group, too- as is learning to use non-violent communication and conflict resolution techniques. Far too often, when Powerful*** people join forces ego gets in the way of Will and starts power*** struggles. We need to recognize and deescalate these situations as they arise, for the sake of all.

The Universe
A Witch's point of view of how the universe is set up and how it "works" is different from that of other religions and people who do not believe in the divine or physics. We study the elements, our creation story, and learn about this animistic viewpoint. Knowing how it is set up allows us to understand that "you" and "me" are fictions that we reinforce to make life a little easier for us in the everyday and also allows us to make changes in the worlds- which is what many of us call "making magick".

Craft/Cunning/Conjure
What use would being a Witch be if s/he didn't use the Power that s/he has built for hirself? So we teach of how to work breath and energy as well and tangible objects and living things to make changes in the worlds. We have a shamanic, animistic outlook on the world, and therefore we must learn the properties of different plants, stones, foods, actions, animals to work our magick to its maximum effect. We learn to use sex, dreams and ingested substances to alter ourselves, others, and therefore the universe.

We also learn and use shapeshifting, out-of-body travel, necromancy and communicating with other non-corporeal beings.

Ethics and Philosophy
Being a Witch makes many people uneasy around you. This is because we are weird and energetically "off" to many, but also because there are no moral codes that to which we must ascribe- like the ten commandments, for example. And while some neo-Wiccans talk of "the threefold law" and "the rede" as their moral compass- my tradition does not ascribe to any moral code that is outside of ourselves. We do not follow the rede and call shenanigans on those Witches who would ascribe any moral code to our workings. Instead, we do the even harder work of cultivating ethics.

These ethics are based on aligning yourself, the Witch, with the Flow of All-There-Is. It means a Witch like me has to constantly do my Work**** to ensure I am not mistaking ego with Will. It means we make decisions that may seem immoral or amoral to outsiders. It means that with this Power comes great Responsibility.

I belong to a peculiar shamanic warrior tradition. We cultivate ethics much like what is outlined in the book Shambhala (which is a Buddhist lineage). Our warrior tradition is based on the interconnectedness of all beings and the reverence and love we have in defending them. We do not shy away from difficult situations. Often we seek them out and meet them head on- in order to not let fear rule us. We are Witches, not ostriches.

We also believe that this tradition is not for everyone. It is not a religion of the masses because not everyone needs to be a Witch (which is a function of society, not just a religious viewpoint). To say that "everyone can be a Witch" is like saying everyone can be an opera singer. Hogwash. Not only is this untrue, but society would suffer if everyone had the same role. We thrive as a culture when people specialize and have specific roles that serve others. We need Witches, teachers, doctors, shopkeepers, midwives, and yes- opera singers. We need mechanics and house builders and farmers. Sometimes a few roles overlap, but mostly they do not. And that is all to the good.

In this path, there are oaths that we take to the gods, to ourselves, to the tradition, and to each other. Breaking them means serious and dire consequences. For example, there are four Witches that I know in the tradition mine used to be a part of* that have broken oaths and/or sacred trusts and I actively shun them and warn people away from them.

They are currently facing serious consequences that only the gods can provide, but I know that it is my duty, as a sacred protector of this tradition, to shun and keep people away from them. They are not to be allowed to play with people's trust or sacred information or the Mysteries any longer. Oathbreakers are up there with murderers, child abusers, and rapists in my book- and no, that is not hyperbole. All four of these types of people have broken sacred trusts and created disconnection through their actions and/or words. It is up to a prospective student to agree to uphold this serious of an oath if they want to learn from me.

I will not charge for teaching the Craft and passing it on. Teaching is a sacred duty that exists out of time and space and certainly capitalism. However, I do demand loyalty and for a prospective student to do their work. I expect that they will be honest with me, themselves, and others. I expect them to work hard and show their work! And I expect that any student of mine, if they become an initiate- will follow these rules as well.

Faery is a mystery tradition, with an unbroken initiatory line extending back through Victor and Cora Anderson, whom we honor as its Grandmasters. Further, Faery is much older than the Andersons. It has its roots in a pre-Gardnerian era coven that had influences from Applachian, Celtic folk magick, and non-Wiccan British Traditional Craft. It was further influenced in the states by Voudou, Bruja, Ho'omana, and other American traditions as it took root here. To paraphrase Victor, this tradition is an amalgam of "the religions of the small dark people of the world."

How I hope to spend my pension years.

The principles that I personally agreed to when I was initiated are here:

Ours is a mystery tradition, which is entered only by means of initiatory rite performed by someone who is already a Faery initiate.

We recognize the value of individual autonomy, but we also recognize and honor the fact that our choices affect the choices of others.

We will not share, divulge or out the names of our initiates or their students.

We honor our oaths to aid and defend our brothers and sisters. We also do not rub elbows with oathbreakers, who are anathema to Witch kin.

Faery is not information; it is the mystery and experience.

Faery curriculum and liturgy, and lore specific to curriculum and liturgy, are not for widespread dissemination. (Which is why I have not posted specific lesson plans here in talking about what I would teach- only ideas and areas of study.)

Only initiates can teach the tradition.

We prefer to teach individually or in small groups. In all our teaching, direct personal contact between teacher and student is essential. This is key to truly KNOW our students, their lives, their decisions, and what they are capable of. In order to add to your family, we must only let the best of the best in.

When we teach Faery, we do so always with a view toward initiation, although there is no guarantee that every student will be initiated.

We recognize that Faery is highly transformative and extremely experiential, requiring closer attention and responsibility than workshops, seminars, or intensives provide.

We do not charge for teaching the core of the Faery tradition.

---

*Faery had a public split with Feri a while back over many issues. Oathbreaking was one of them. My tradition split from a faction of the tradition who are very public teachers and authors because the Gods called for us to preserve the Mystery. We no longer share lore or gnosis with the public ("Feri") face of the trad, and their theology and lore will suffer for it. Looking up the road, I see very different outcomes for both traditions.

**There is a difference between will- with a small w- which is individualistic and often is tied to ego and Will- with a capital W- which is aligning yourself to the Flow and following it.

***I make a difference also between Power with a capital P, which in my tradition is one of the five human birthrights and comes from within (not by exploiting and subjugating others) and power with a small p- which has often been corrupted in our culture to mean oppression and subjugation of others for personal gain.

****Work, when used with a capital W, refers to The Great Work- of personal alchemy.

Lammas/Lughnasadh

Yesterday/today is on of the wheel of the year sabbats, Lammas. Depending on what kind of witch you are, it has several meanings. For many, it is an agricultural/fertility holiday- drawing on the first harvest or it is a time when the grain is cut. People make wheat weavings and corn dollies at this time.

It is a time when the sacred king begins his sacrifice for the good of the people, too. So in this house, we bake bread (Loaf-mas!) that looks like a person, and "sacrifice" it for *our* common good by eating it. It is a hands-on activity that can be explained to children easily. As he gets older, there will be more pomp and circumstance and ritualized actions, but the point is to tie us to the Wheel, to practice re-tying us to the cycle of the seasons and the Mysteries.

Today, I am creating a special sourdough starter that I plan on keeping for sabbats and passing onto my son when he finally leaves home- a starter steeped in tradition and The Craft. What are you doing to teach your children about Lammas?

Happy Oestara!

Last year, I wrote about Easter's pagan roots for those of you that are unaware that most of the cultural trapping of Easter, as it is practiced here in the US is pagan in origin.

This year, I get to start some of the exciting family traditions with Rowan, because he is old enough to participate and understand more. So what are we doing?

Yes, this mama bought peeps.

Today, I picked up the symbols of Oestre, goddess of spring and renewal, namely, rabbits, baby animals, and eggs. I got Rowan a bright spring green bucket decorated with bunnies in lieu of a basket (we can use it at the beach later this year and is so much more durable than those flimsy dyed baskets)!

I got some reusable plastic eggs to stuff full of sweets, coins, and stickers of baby animals. I got a gy-normous chocolate rabbit, mainly for the satisfying squeal factor. Yes, mama loves it and panders!

Norway's "Easter Witch"

I picked up some chalk eggs for us to draw flowers on the sidewalk after our egg hunt. I plan on decorating the house when he naps tomorrow, and taking him out of the house immediately afterwards. After we pick up his daddy from work, we'll come home and "discover" that there are eggs hidden everywhere! I think he'll get a big kick out of it.

Tonight, we have guests coming for dinner and it is a potluck. But if we were doing this sabbat to the nines (as I hope to do next year) we would have a suckling pig.

For those of you looking for ideas, I have an Oestara Pinterest board, as well as boards for Beltaine and other sabbats (and non Witch holidays, too!). What are you doing with your Witchlets this sabbat?

Merry Twelfth Night, everyone!

Here I am, being "Five Gold Rings"

Twelfth Night is a recently Christianized holiday that Christians call Epiphany. But its roots go back far longer than the birth of Christ. Saturnalia was the main influence for this fun holiday, where the world turns topsy-turvy: masters become servants, children boss adults around, and people cross-dress and have a grand old time.

In teaching Sunday school about this day at my local UU church, it was appropriate that the youth and kids performed the 12 Days of Christmas (another co-opted tradition- it was a pub drinking game played on Twelfth Night) and many of the teens cross dressed.

Getting that lipstick just right.

This holiday was co-opted by Christians seeking to get rid of those (super fun, in my opinion) insidious persistent and well-loved pagan celebrations- like Yule (lights, feasts, gift exchanges, and the Yule log) becoming Christmas, Samhain (the dead and other "spooky" subjects) becoming Halloween and Ostara (fertile rabbits and eggs) becoming Easter. Unlike the other holidays, many of the pagan traditions have not carried over to Twelfth Night, and I think that's a shame.

In a time honored pagan tradition, our
"maid a milking" feels up our
"lady dancing"!

I cannot remember what book it was, but I remember reading a Witchcraft book about a decade ago in which the author proposed that we include Twelfth Night as a ninth sabbat in the Wheel of the Year. After all, nine is a much more magical number than eight, and this holiday gets at the issue of difference, class, and society in a way that none of the others do. I have to say I agree with that author (can anyone here help me out so I can give credit where credit is due? Anyone remember the book or author?)

So, what's a Witch to do on this day? Invite folks over for a raucous party, of course! Bake a cake with a bean or token in it (I have a tiny Dionysos ceramic figure from Italy that is meant to be baked into cakes- I find it perfect!) and that person rules over the party and makes rules for everyone else! The Lord of Misrule is an English spin on this age-old Saturnalian tradition- a person is chosen at random and rules over the entire community for a day. The crazier the social order that they created, the better job that they did!

The Real Witches of Halloween!

Welcome to day one of the The Real Witches of Halloween Blog Tour! All month long, you can click on a blog about Halloween written by actual Witches. You can learn what it means (and doesn't mean) to us as a holiday, how we celebrate or ritualize this day, and much much more. Click here for the Witch_Blog page, so you can read us all, one day at a time!

For me, there's Halloween (a secular fun holiday that I love) and then there's Samhain (the actual sabbat on the Wheel of the Year that I celebrate as a religious holiday).

Halloween is going to be so much fun now that I have a kid. (How cool is it that I get to re-live all the best stuff again?!) Halloween is an awesome holiday- adults love it, but kids win on this day in a huge way. Dress up, sweets, pranks, parties, and decorations all make this day a boatload of awesome for any kid. This year, we are teaching Rowan how to say "trick or treat" and have a little pumpkin basket for him to gather candy in that he has been playing with. Because of his obsession with elephants (he asks to see them multiple times a day), his Nanny is making him an elephant costume. We are going to take him trick or treating on this small Appalachian town. He's gonna love it.

Halloween is a holiday that most Americans understand and participate in. It is a cultural touchstone that he can share with his peers.

Conversely, for me- Samhain is a religious holiday. It is when we Witches commune with the dead- the veil between the worlds is thin and we rip it down completely to allow the dead to come through to commune with us and experience corporeal existence and its pleasures once more. We prepare foods for our ancestors that they loved, for example.

I will be teaching my son about Samhain as well as Halloween. We have a dead altar to feed and clean, and then we will be picnicking in the cemetery where generations of his relatives reside.

How do you celebrate Halloween and/or Samhain?

Eclectic Circling

In my 20 odd years of Witchcraft, I have circled with many other Witches in varying traditions, Druids, Ceremonial Magicians, Masons, Gnostics, Heathens, and many many others who would fall under the pagan umbrella.

Often public rituals are eclectic in this regard- a group will host a ritual for say, Samhain for the benefit of the greater pagan community, including their own tradition, but open to anyone else. I have also hosted gatherings and sabbats where not everyone is on the same page magickally- some are students while others are initiated into a tradition. This creates a challenge: how does one keep the potency of a working, while working with and acknowledging these differences in perspectives, skill levels, and religions present?

Well, you try. Often you just can't please everyone. But here are some tips when planning such an event that will get you off to a great start:

1. Start planning your event months beforehand. Put out a call to let the greater community know that you will be planning such an event and ask for their participation. This allows interested parties time to get involved.

As someone who has planned lots of events as well as been a community organizer, I can tell you that people who actually show up and do the work of making something happen are greatly outnumbered by those that avail themselves of your work and possibly criticize it. I simply do not let those people affect me adversely and my organizing work. When they offer suggestions, I listen. I thank them for their input, take what suggestions are helpful, and suggest that if they want input into next time, that they join the planning committee to make that happen.

I also lay out in the call for organizers that those that show up to do the work are the ones who have input into what we do and why. This eliminates the "comments from the peanut gallery" from people that aren't actually organizing (that often happens when people try and plan by email list).

2. Have actual planning meetings (in person) not conference calls and email lists. You can use the latter tools for following up on work decided upon in meetings, but making decisions in a diverse group without face-to-face contact and actual dialogue is not productive.

While your planning committee may be smaller by requiring that people meet in person at times, I have found that the people who commit to show up in advance are the people that end up doing everything anyway. The others who cannot spare a few hours over the course of a couple months really do not have the time and energy for the project- because that is what doing the project right requires. Quality of organizer is more important than quantity.

3. Start your meeting with introductions that are specific. Names, religious traditions, and what they are hoping to get out of the ritual or event. Ask for specifics and take notes. See if there are similarities in what people are saying- those links and commonalities are important and will help you build bridges and craft an event that works for the most people involved/attending.

4. Think lowest common denominator. Nothing stirs up resentments faster than a public event, which was supposed to be for a greater community, reflecting only a handful of participants' religions. So think- what is it that you all have in common? The elements and the directions? A specific animal? A god or myth cycle that you follow? Use that to plan the theme, details, and story arc of your ritual. Similarities are great, but what about when you run into differences?

5. Tell a story, using creative elements. Song, dance, visual symbolism, tactile elements- all have a place and should be employed in how the ritual connects people to the story that you are telling. All of these elements also give you a better chance of connecting with diverse traditions- because all have something to share in this regard and can be of help.

I have found that an approach that acknowledges differences in an obvious way (like taking bits of different styles of creating sacred space and inserting them into the script) helps. It's even better when this attempt is obvious- like creating a program so that attendees can see their trad represented as well as myriad others equally.

What tips have you found helpful in organizing a diverse group?

Lughnasadh is coming!

"Kernnunos" by Yannick Germain

I spent my Midsummer circling with other traditional Witches in a small ritual circle and subsequent feast. We invited the red and green man to come visit and tell us of upcoming needs and duties.  It was a pretty traditional sabbat, according to the wheel of the year mythos that my tradition follows.

The next sabbat is coming at the beginning of August- and since we are moving very soon afterwards (across the country from the SF Bay Area to Columbus, Ohio), we are doing a purely social harvest feast rather than planning an elaborate ritual and invoking gods this time around. We want to be surrounded by our friends and chosen family here, regardless of religion. We have decided that Lughnasadh is going to be our farewell party to many of our family and friends here. In case you don't know about this sabbat, here is some background:

It is a harvest festival- one of a few in the Wheel of the Year (the next is Mabon, a type of Witches' Thanksgiving). Lugh, the Irish god of light, called for the celebration at the beginning of August as a funeral feast for his mother, Tailte- who had been a patron of beginning agriculture. What better wake for such a figure than a harvest feast? Lugh also called for games of skill and strength for the celebration, and it has been a favorite time for marriages and handfastings.

The first of the three harvest festivals that make up the Wheel of the Year, Lughnasadh is the "festival of first fruits", where a blessing of the crop would take place around this time of the year as now was the time that apples were beginning to ripen on the trees, summer vegetables being picked from the gardens, and the corn waits to be harvested. It is the time to start gathering in the first harvests of grain, wheat and barley. That is certainly cause for celebration! Baking loaves of bread for this celebration is appropriate and we will certainly do so.

And so we celebrate this year- the Wheel is turning and we Kunnings turn with it. Our family turns eastward- to Columbus, our new home. Any of my readers from central Ohio? I would love to hear from you!

Beltaine Recap

Beltaine sparkle outfit

So as you may know, The Kunnings headed up to Wolf Creek, Oregon to a Radical Faerie sanctuary for Beltaine- as we have done for the last three or so years. The Beltaine celebration there is traditional, from a Witchcraft perspective, and the land is beautiful, sacred, and where our son Rowan was conceived. So we look forward to going each year.

This year, we were up for a little over three days- We arrived Friday morning and left Monday afternoon. It was a whirlwind weekend, as Friday there was a wedding, Saturday was Walpurgisnacht, and Sunday was Beltaine- each event with its own special preparation and celebration.

Wedding cakes!

While I was not part of the official prep for the wedding, I was honored to attend. The love the two involved share is obvious and they are a couple that is tied to this land and community, which made this wedding an amazing blessing to witness and be a part of. The feast afterwards was amazing- see the little cupcakes we had in the barn afterwards? Yum.

Walpurgisnacht requires removing last year's maypole, transporting it to the fire pit, preparing it and the firepit for a loooong bonfire (the pole from the previous year must be ashes before the new one is used), and then starting the bonfire shortly after supper. To do it properly and with the right kind of reverence takes time.

This year's maypole.

Beltaine means going out and finding the right tree, felling it, stripping it and preparing the ribbons. Then when the festivities start, it is carried in a loud, joyous procession to Maypole Meadow and placed in a newly dug hole. Then a new May Queen is found, the old one passes the torch, and we begin the festivities in earnest.

Monday was a time for sad good byes and trying to find everyone before we left- there are some folks we only see at the sabbat! How did you celebrate Beltaine?

Walpurgisnacht & Beltaine

Image by State Library of Queensland, Australia via Flickr

Also not attendees of WC's Beltaine, for privacy reasons.

The Kunnings are making their annual pilgrimage up to Wolf Creek Sanctuary for Beltaine and Walpurgisnacht with the Radical Faeries! We have gone the last several years, and the place has special meaning for us- Rowan was conceived there at Beltaine- so the land and this holiday in particular are near and dear to our hearts.

We will be taking a mini-van with 3 other adults up to the sanctuary and will be there from Friday morning through Monday afternoon. Bonus- a couple long-time Faeries are getting married on Friday! Huzzah!That means we get a wedding, Walpurgisnacht, and Beltaine- all in one jam-packed weekend!

Image by Ben Amstutz via Flickr

Not a pic of folks at WC- that is private.

On Walpurgis night, it is the tradition of this gathering to have an all-night party and burn the maypole from last year's festival in the central firepit. We cannot start a new maypole dance on Beltaine until the old one is cold ash.

Beltaine festivities start in the afternoon in a meadow especially reserved for this event each year, aptly named "Maypole Meadow". A tree is selected before this weekend and felled. All reverence and thanks are given to this tree. During the weekend, volunteers strip it of its branches and bark, except for the very top, which will be visible above the fray of ribbons.

Special sacraments are passed, intentions are set, and then we are off to the races! I remember the first year we went, a friend we brought fretted that it was goingt o take "forever" to dance the maypole, as it was so tall and there were hundreds of ribbons (for all the attendees). She need not have worried. Chaos magick reigns in this place, and it took no time at all for the spider-web mess of a maypole to get done. No prim and proper "in and out" here- it was "do what thou wilt"!

After the Maypole, there are myriad festivities happening all over the land. You are free to take part in any mischief you can find. That evening in the barn (the biggest common building, where the communal kitchen is) is a dance like you have never seen. Joyous, ecstatic, writhing bodies of all kinds together. THIS is a proper Beltaine.

How do you celebrate this time of year?

Happy Solstice & Eclipse Everyone!

Winter Solstice Lunar Eclipse from William Castleman on Vimeo.

Jethro Tull- Ring Out Solstice Bells!

Let's Talk Traditions!

Welcome to the December Carnival of Natural Parenting: Let's Talk Traditions

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama.


Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

***
This is my son's first year, and he just celebrated his first (secular) Thanksgiving. It was not a "typical one" for us (we visited two different Thanksgiving feasts, not hosting our own), and it started me thinking- what traditions do I want to have for my newly formed family? Now is the time to start, so we can establish these rituals for a lifetime.

My partner and I have already made a commitment to celebrate and mark the wheel of the year with our son, as we both feel that turning the wheel, as a community, ties us to one another, the land and its natural cycles, and the Gods. That is what being a Witch is all about, yes? But each sabbat has its own mythos and associated traditions. (Many of these rituals will seem familiar to people raised as or practicing Christianity, as most of the rituals around Christmas, Halloween, and Easter come from pagan origins.)

For Yule, the sabbat on the horizon, we celebrate the birth of the sun/son. We burn a Yule log, stay up all night (sound like midnight mass, anyone?) and celebrate the longest night of the year. We have a tree that we decorate, and we string lights and place candles everywhere to celebrate the return of the light. We exchange gifts. We sing songs. We bake and cook and feast. We decorate with evergreen, holly, and mistletoe. This year, Yule falls on a lunar eclipse, so we will be incorporating that into our ritual, to be sure!

I loved my family of origin's traditions at this time of year (under the guise of Christmas, as I was raised what I call "secular christian") and hope to start some of these traditions as my own. My mother was great at establishing honored traditions that I hope to continue with my family.

My most beloved thing this time of year was decorating the tree: my mother made it a point to buy or make each of us children ornaments that commemorated something that happened to us that particular year: piano lessons, getting pet birds, breaking my leg sledding, etc. Then she would write our names and the year on the bottom. Each year, we would pull the ornaments out, one at a time, and remember and tell stories about that year: "Remember when we thought my girl finch was a boy and my boy finch was a girl- until he laid an egg!" and laugh and have a good time slowly decorating the tree. Included in our ornament melange were also ornaments that we had made in scouts and at school. I still have a snowman ornament that I painted that has a big bite taken out of it. My littlest sister thought it was a cookie!

I want Rowan to have this tradition, and when he is older, he will have a box of ornaments to remember with, just like his mom! I also want to bake cookies with him, have people over, have a fire with hot cocoa and mulled cider, tell stories, sing songs, and stay up all night. Perhaps he can host a Yule sleepover when he gets older- and stay up all night with his friends.

Ostara, by Helena Nelson Reed

As for other traditions, Ostara has bunnies and eggs as symbols of budding fertility- so egg hunts and chocolate bunnies are in order! We head up to Wolf Creek sanctuary each Beltaine to dance around the Maypole with kin. Mabon is the witches' Thanksgiving feast. And we plan on creating all sorts of special traditions around Midsummer and Imbolg as well. Birthdays always deserve a party and I hope to get Rowan's help with themes and ideas each year- it IS a celebration of him, after all!

Tell me how you celebrate! What traditions do you have in your family- whether around holidays or not?

***

Visit Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

• Traditions? What traditions? — Olivia at Write About Birth needs your advice: how can she make the most of the holiday season in a new country with only her immediate family? (@writeaboutbirth)
• TRADITION!!!!!! — Ella at My Intentional Journey reminds us all to be thankful for family traditions; there are those who have none.
• tradition! — Stefanie at Very, Very Fine came to realize that families can make incredible memories, even if they're not wealthy (or organized).
• Taking a child's perspective on traditions — Lauren at Hobo Mama wants to keep in mind how important even the mundane traditions will be to her little ones. (@Hobo_Mama)
• Sunday Dinners and Lullabies — Kat at Loving {Almost} Every Moment finds traditions in the small things throughout the year.
• Simple Family Advent Traditions — Michelle at The Parent Vortex crafted a set of advent bags with daily surprises to eat and to do. (@TheParentVortex)
• Parenting: Family Meetings - A Timeless Tradition — Amy Phoenix at Innate Wholeness discusses a year-round tradition in her household: Family Meetings. (@InnateWholeness)
• Our Mindful Holidays — They may not be "traditional" traditions, but they fit the family of Kellie at Our Mindful Life.
• Our Holiday Traditions, New and Old — Even with three young children, Kristin at Intrepid Murmurings is finding ways to be intentional and meaningful about holiday traditions. (@sunfrog)
• Our Cupcake Custom — Amy at Anktangle knows celebrations need minimal excuse and lots of cupcakes! (@anktangle)
• On the bunny slope of tradition-making — Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama is finding her groove as a holistic-minded mama with a joyful holiday spirit. (@crunchychewy)
• No, Virginia, There Is Not a Santa Claus — Just because her family is not going to do Santa, does not mean that Sheila at A Gift Universe can't instill some mystery and magic into Christmas. (@agiftuniverse)
• New Traditions — Becky at Future Legacy shares a few traditions she is starting for her family, including popovers, a birthday banner, and service.
• My Holiday Family Traditions — The Artsymama continues a long tradition of adopting family members and sharing two favorite games that work well for a crowd.
• Mindfully Creating Family Traditions — Alison at BluebirdMama has ideas for celebrating birthdays, Valentine's Day, and Christmas — though her family's still figuring some of it out. (@bluebirdmama)
• Memorable Traditions — Lori Ann at MamaWit follows four mindful steps when instituting any tradition.
• Let's Talk Traditions — Lily, aka Witch Mom shares her family's traditions that are centered on the wheel of the year. (@lilyshahar)
• Homeschool Christmas — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now did not always celebrate the Christmas season in the same way with her family, but they always celebrated together. (@DebChitwood)
• Holidays, food and family — For Kristen at Adventures in Mommyhood, the holidays are about family and food. (@crunchymamato2)
• Giving Christmas to the Critter — Rachael at The Variegated Life has found a way to tie her Zen practices to the Christmas story of the baby in the manger. (@RachaelNevins)
• Family Traditions + To Santa Or Not To Santa — Stop by Natural Parents Network to discover some of the traditions from other natural parents. NPN is also featuring snippets of posts from NP bloggers on the topic of whether to encourage children to believe in Santa Claus. (@NatParNet)
• Family Tradition Origins — Momma Jorje discusses her family's traditions, and her desire not to make anyone feel obligated to conform to them.
• Everyday Traditions — For Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children it's the small, daily traditions that make life special.
• Establishing Traditions and Older Child Adoption — MrsH at Fleeting Moments is trying to find ways to start traditions with a family that was made very quickly through birth and adoption.
• Emerging Family Traditions — Melodie at Breastfeeding Moms Unite! shares some of her favorite birthday and Christmas traditions. (@bfmom)
• Does Rebellion Count? — Seonaid at the Practical Dilettante has instituted a day of rest and PJs at her house on Christmas. (@seonaid_lee)
• December Carnival of Natural Parenting: Family Traditions — Sybil at Musings of a Milk Maker tries to give her girls a mix of traditions to foster togetherness — but worries that not being near extended family is a disconnect.
• Craft-tea Christmas Celebrations — Lucy at Dreaming Aloud created a delicious Christmas tradition that she named "Craft-tea."
• A Christmas Tradition — Luschka at Diary of a First Child knows that even though she won't be able to have her usual holiday traditions this year, the important thing is that she has her family. (@lvano)
• Celebrations without the Holiday — Asha at Meta Mom shares several ways to celebrate the winter holidays without focusing on religious traditions. (@metamomma)
• Celebrating the Journey We Have Traveled Together — Acacia at Be Present enjoys the chance to draw closer to her family during the Christmas holiday.
• Celebrating Motherhood — Do you celebrate the day you became a mother? Dionna at Code Name: Mama offers some ideas for traditions to mark your passage into motherhood. (@CodeNameMama)
• Celebrate! Winter Traditions Brought Home. — At True Confessions of a Real Mommy, TrueRealMommy and her family are celebrating many different religions and traditions this month. Stop by to see their schedule of events. (@TrueRealMommy)
• "Always Ready", Holiday Style — Amy at Toddler In Tow discovered that it's not the traditions themselves, but the emotional experience behind them that makes them special.

Tangible Witchcraft/Craft for Kids: Seasonal Altar (for Winter)

Helping kids understand the meanings of the sabbats can be assisted by building a seasonal altar (that you can keep and decorate year round!). At the core of all pagan traditions is a reverence for the earth and its cycles. Having a seasonal altar that reflects those cycles and the turning of the wheel can help kids understand in a tangible way how they are connected to this planet and to everything on it.

Rowan will be having an altar like this of his own very soon (when he is old enough to handle things without gleefully smashing them). I imagine that when he is out and about and finds an object that he is drawn to, it will be placed there. Flowers in the spring, shells and rocks from the beach in summer, fallen leaves in the fall, and dead twigs in the winter- all can take their place on his special altar.

Using this tool to teach kids the Craft can be gloriously easy, yet profound: when it is time for the wheel to turn to a new sabbat and season, we can talk about things that would be good for placement on the altar. As we talk about different concepts, we place a tangible anchor to that idea or symbol on the altar. We can have things on this altar that explain both the season and the sabbat that falls in it.

Seasonally, we can have things on the altar the symbolize darkness and its sacredness, life going on in spite of cold and dark, hibernation, the coming back of the light (starting at Yule) and plants and other things that symbolize this time of year (pinecones and other evergreen things). Sabbat-wise, at Yule we celebrate the return of the son/sun and the coming of the light after the longest night of the year (fairy lights or candles (if your child isn't old enough- there are great LED candles to use at most craft shops). The Holly King (this would be on your altar from earlier in the year) makes way for the Oak King (day after Yule). Perhaps a gorgeous gold sphere could be covered in a black cloth, and the day after Yule it is unveiled. The ideas are only limited by your imagination.

How do you teach your kids about the Wheel and its sabbats?

Tangible Witchcraft: Samhain preparations

Priest, dressed as the
dying king.

So the gauntlet of organizing pan-Feri Samhain is over, thank the Gods! Each year for the last several years, my partner and I have taken it upon ourselves to organize this sabbat for the benefit of the greater community. It is a lot of work, and I believe that it is worth it. Communities only work well when they get face-to-face time. As nice as Facebook is, it is no substitute for breaking bread with your kith and kin. Trying to "be a community" online leads to dysfunction. And religious communities need to have rituals and rites that they share in, too. We come together to turn the wheel of the year- as a tradition. I feel it is very important.

Offering tray for the dead

I got some pictures of our set up (I would not take pictures during a ritual!) so that you could get an idea of what goes into prepping a space for such an endeavor. Prior to getting to the space, we had several meetings, email exchanges and phone calls with lots of people who agreed to take on ritual roles, volunteer, and bring things to the ritual for our use. We secured a hall at the BFUU, as we do each year. Then we met several times to craft the story arc of the ritual- what story were we telling at this time of year?

Prepping the space

There are familiar traditional elements to each sabbat, and Samhain is no different. We commune with our dead, meet specific dieties that are key to this time of year, and allow the dead to ride us as we do embodied activities (dancing, eating, etc.). Our dumb supper is a part of this ritual each year- a ritual meal we consume in silence as we feast on the items we brought specifically for our beloved and mighty dead- things we knew that they liked. In years past, I have brought pickled beets (Grandma Dora Lee), liver and onions (Grandpa Bill), and this year I brought creamed spinach (Great Grandma Addie Belle). My partner, Oberyn, tends to bring the same thing each year for the same dead person- his former teacher's (Gabriel Carillo) apple crisp. Everything brought was delicious and amazing.

Table for the feast with the dead

The Western Gate

The working altar

Grandmaster chair

While we may not do a larger ritual for the entire community at the next sabbat (Yule), we are already thinking about how to celebrate it and introduce Rowan to the return of the son/sun!